DAVINCI HAS TAKEN AN ABSOLUTELY INSANE OVERALL VICTORY AT DAYTONA INTERNATIONAL SPEEDWAY, SLAMMING THE #49 LOSEL RACING SALEEN S7-R ACROSS THE FINISH LINE AFTER 18 BLISTERING LAPS IN 14:51.230! BUT THE REAL DRAMA WAS AT THE VERY CHEQUERED FLAG WHERE FERNANDO HORTA LOST THE GT2 CLASS VICTORY TO JEAN ALESI BY AN AGONIZING EIGHT-THOUSANDTHS OF A SECOND! 0.008 SECONDS AT 180 MILES PER HOUR! WE REWIND THE TAPE NOW TO THE HIGH-SPEED RADIO COMMUNICATOR CHAOS INSIDE THE #01 BORROWED B194 PORSCHE GT3-RSR TO SEE HOW THIS ABSOLUTE PHOTOFINISH DISASTER UNFOLDED ON THE BANKING!
Fernando Horta (#01): DUUDE! I am floating on the Daytona banking! The slipstream is pulling me into orbit! Can we catch Davinci's Saleen for the lead?!
Earthworm Jim (#01 crew): Groovy. No, Fernando. Davinci crossed the line ten seconds ago, completed 18 laps, and is currently eating a sandwich. You are on lap 17 fighting for 13th place overall.
Fernando Horta (#01): Shut up, Jim! Look at Jean Alesi in front! I am sucking the exhaust fumes out of his Ferrari 360! Give me full boost!
Earthworm Jim (#01 crew): You are already at full throttle. The engine is operating at peak capacity, but your racing line resembles a frightened earthworm trying to escape a lawnmower.
Fernando Horta (#01): What about Valentino Rossi behind us? Is he closing in on the high line?!
Earthworm Jim (#01 crew): Valentino is three seconds back listening to soulful sounds. Your only immediate threat is your own catastrophic lack of spatial awareness.
Fernando Horta (#01): I am drafting Alesi through the tri-oval! I am going to pull out and pass him at the stripe! I am a golden god of Florida motorsport!
Earthworm Jim (#01 crew): You are a grown man in a borrowed Porsche getting out-paced by Cole Trickle's G2 Corvette. Turn the wheel less and breathe more.
Fernando Horta (#01): I’m side by side! Look at us! Nose to nose! Photofinish, Jim! Did we get him?! Did we snatch the GT2 win at the line?!
Earthworm Jim (#01 crew): You lost by 0.008 seconds. A single strand of hair on Alesi's bumper defeated you. Eat dirt, Fernando.
Ps. Rodrigo, please remind Jim that firing plasma blasters at the timing screen is strictly prohibited by pit lane regulations.
