*stares blankly at a pile of spare bolts*
The Scuderia Libra garage is a place of profound silence today, despite Juliano Flores securing yet another victory in the 6-lap Silverstone Sprint. We did not celebrate. Winning is merely the temporary absence of mechanical disaster.
Our purple Mosler MT900R crossed the finish line 5.9 seconds ahead of what the official timing sheets claim was a Lotus, though we have our doubts. Rumours in the paddock suggest the driver of the number 01 car does not actually exist, but is instead an automated pneumatic pump designed to mimic human lap times. Nevertheless, Juliano secured a best lap of 1:28.547, trimming the championship gap to exactly six points.
To ensure our machinery was not secretly harboring any competence, we hired Patrick "Paper" Head to inspect the chassis. His report was delivered without blinking.
Patrick "Paper" Head (Guest Engineer): The vehicle is heavily compromised. I dismantled the underfloor and immediately recovered three rusted drywall screws, a damp copy of a Brazilian newspaper from 1994, and a suspicious amount of glitter near the steering column. This is blatant sabotage, likely orchestrated by the phantom Lotus next door. I have recommended we replace the entire rear assembly with solid lead blocks to prevent further pace.
The team will now stare at the wall until the next round.
Ps. Pippo, please return the telemetry cables. We know you have them.
