Albilad-Saudia Racing Team issued a press release this morning that reads as follows:
It is with a heart heavier than a lead-ballasted sidepod that we must announce the catastrophic truncation of our campaign at Mazda Raceway Laguna Seca. Our brave duude Fernando Horta, navigating the #27 Williams FW07 through the treacherous early skirmishes, was brutally ripped from this mortal coil of competitive asphalt on lap one due to a collision of unspeakable cruelty. While Jacques Laffite soared to glory and our rivals cheered, our garage was plunged into an abysmal, tear-soaked twilight. Son Goku of Capsule Corp engineering wept openly into a bowl of instant ramen, while Blanka from Street Fighter gnawed despairingly on a stray Pirelli tyre. The cosmos has conspired against us, the racing gods are deaf to our sovereign wails, and the season is effectively reduced to ash and sorrow. We demand immediate spiritual cleansing of the entire pit lane.
Barry McCockiner (The Daily Chicanery): Mr. Horta, how does one manage to implode an entire world championship effort before most spectators have even finished their overpriced hot dogs?
Hugh Janus (Pit Lane Gazette): Is it true that Blanka was assigned to suspension setup because you wanted someone who understands how it feels to get electrocuted on track?
*Goku drops a half-eaten energy bean on the floor and stares blankly at the timing monitors as the team accountant starts crying*
