Session 8905 - Melbourne Grand Prix Circuit, Australia

October 01, 2026 07:56pm

Race

Quick Stats

  • Track Length: 5.291 km
  • Most Distance Covered: 10 laps, 52.910 km
  • Simulator Used: GTR2

Race report: Melbourne Press Conference: Lackson and Flav Grill Horta Over 43-Second Disparity

*TICKER - DIÁRIO DO PNEU MURCHO:* AUSTRALIAN BORDER FORCE CONFIRMS REST OF GT2 GRID WAS NOT DETAINED, THEY WERE SIMPLY DRIVING IN SLOW MOTION.*

The Melbourne media centre was remarkably sterile, smelling faintly of damp Albert Park grass as the top finishers took their seats under the intense, unblinking glare of Losel Racing's management.

Samuel J. Lackson (Losel Racing Moderator): We are going to do this fast, we are going to do this clean, and nobody is going to ask any stupid questions about why the yellow Corvette was six seconds a lap faster than the laws of God and physics should allow. Proceed.

(Geraldo Speed - Gazeta de Pinhais): Fernando, you started eleventh on the grid and won by over forty-three seconds in just ten laps. Did you find a secret highway bypass through the Albert Park golf course?

Fernando Horta: No. To be honest, I thought the other cars had a serious mechanical problem. I actually turned their performance settings up to 102% of their capacity in the garage computer before the race, but on the track, it was like driving through heavy traffic on the Radial Leste. I spent most of the ten laps trying to avoid rear-ending them because they were braking where there were no corners.

Flavor Flav (Losel Racing Timekeeper): *Points to giant clock necklace* BOY, THAT IS AN UNBELIEVABLE GAP! FORTY-THREE POINT SIX SECONDS! THE TIME IS LATE, THE TRAIN IS GONE, YEAH BOY!

Samuel J. Lackson (Losel Racing Moderator): Flav, if you yell about that clock one more time in this press room, I will personally throw it into the lake. Let the reporter from the UK speak.

(Nigel Teatime - The Daily Apex): David Canavan, you started on pole position in the Schubert BMW. You had a clear track ahead of you. How did you end up finishing 43.6 seconds behind a driver who started eleventh?

David Canavan: I drove my absolute heart out, set a personal best of 2:00.323, and felt like a champion. Then the Corvette went past me on lap three. I didn't even hear the engine, just a low whistling noise, and then he was gone. By lap seven, I could only see him when I used binoculars on the back straight. It was a very humbling experience.

(Chuck McSnack - Motorsport Insider): Fernando, your best lap was a 1:54.648, while second-place finisher Canavan's best was a 2:00.323, and the rest of the thirty-car field was similarly grouped in the two-minute mark. How do you explain being six seconds faster per lap?

Fernando Horta: I can only assume my Corvette was fueled by very high-quality fuel, or perhaps the other teams were running on warm Guaraná. I just drove. But really, it was dangerous. They were moving very slowly.

Samuel J. Lackson (Losel Racing Moderator): That is enough of this nonsense. Go home. This conference is officially over.

Ps. Rodrigo, please check if the AI was set to 'easy' or if they were just admiring the local Australian birds. We need a real challenge next time.

Disclaimer: This is a fictional, satirical report of a offline race against AI-driven opponents. All characters are fictional. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental

Classification

Position Driver Team Car Laps Gap Grid Best Lap
1 Brazil FERNANDO HORTA CORVETTE RACING CHEVROLET CORVETTE C6-R GT2 10 0:19:48.668 11 1:54.648
2 United Kingdom DAVID CANAVAN SCHUBERT MOTORSPORT BMW Z4 GT3 10 + 43.649 1 2:00.323
3 USA RICH HROMIN MATECH MUSTANG RACING FORD MUSTANG FR500-GT 10 + 43.989 2 2:00.288
4 USA JOHNNY LUGNUTS JMB RACING FERRARI F430 GT2 10 + 44.372 3 2:00.349
5 USA TONY ATKINS ROCKETSPORTS RACING JAGUAR XKR GT 10 + 44.905 6 2:00.006
6 USA MITCH VAMOS KRK RACING VIPER COMPETITION COUPE 10 + 50.419 7 2:00.676
7 USA GREGORY MYERS KISSLING MOTORSPORT CHEVROLET CORVETTE ZO6R GT3 10 + 53.397 9 2:00.350
8 USA AL MARIMON MATECH MUSTANG RACING FORD MUSTANG FR500-GT 10 + 55.003 4 2:01.101
9 USA BRAD MERYS CHAMBERLAIN MOTORSPORT TVR T400R 10 + 55.939 5 2:00.521
10 USA VLADO KENATS MULTIMATIC MOTORSPORT PANOZ ESPERANTE GTLM 10 + 56.163 17 1:59.439
11 USA ROBERT OTTO DRAYSON RACING ASTON MARTIN VANTAGE GT2 10 + 58.476 12 2:01.954
12 USA JON WATHEN MASERATI CORSE MASERATI TROFEO LIGHT 10 + 59.180 8 2:01.192
13 USA ROY SIMMONS ROCKETSPORTS RACING JAGUAR XKR GT 10 + 59.571 15 2:01.161
14 USA MARTIN CHEVRIER MULTIMATIC MOTORSPORT PANOZ ESPERANTE GTLM 10 + 01:00.074 18 2:01.152
15 USA DREW LIDKEA HEXIS RACING ASTON MARTIN DBRS9 10 + 01:00.904 16 2:01.309
16 USA SIMON GOODWIN HEXIS RACING ASTON MARTIN DBRS9 10 + 01:01.389 19 2:01.176
17 USA BJÖRN HEHMANN GRAVITY RACING MOSLER MT900R 10 + 01:02.422 10 2:00.543
18 USA ERIC MARECKI PHOENIX RACING AUDI R8 GT3 LMS 10 + 01:04.637 24 2:00.574
19 Canada IAN JOLICOEUR RAHAL LETTERMAN RACING BMW E92 M3 GTR 10 + 01:05.159 21 2:00.885
20 USA LOU MASCIARELLI JMB RACING FERRARI F430 GT2 10 + 01:05.972 14 2:00.976
21 USA CHUCK CARTER MASERATI CORSE MASERATI TROFEO LIGHT 10 + 01:06.672 13 2:00.967
22 USA ANDREW WERNER SPYKER SQUADRON SPYKER C8 SPYDER GT2-R 10 + 01:08.002 22 2:01.265
23 USA VINCENT LOI REITER ENGINEERING LAMBORGHINI GALLARDO LP560 10 + 01:08.273 25 2:00.824
24 USA GUP DOUGLAS BMW MOTORSPORT BMW E46 M3 GTR 10 + 01:11.065 23 2:01.069
25 USA CHRIS MOSES BMW MOTORSPORT BMW E46 M3 GTR 10 + 01:13.147 20 2:01.769
26 USA DAVID POEL SPYKER SQUADRON SPYKER C8 SPYDER GT2-R 10 + 01:13.561 27 2:01.593
27 USA MARTY UREN RAHAL LETTERMAN RACING BMW E92 M3 GTR 10 + 01:14.003 28 2:00.995
28 USA CHRISTIAN HAMILTON CORVETTE RACING CHEVROLET CORVETTE C6-R GT2 10 + 01:14.857 29 2:01.704
29 Brazil THIAGO CANOLA FLYING LIZARD MOTORSPORT PORSCHE 996 GT3-RSR 10 + 01:15.508 30 2:01.741
30 USA JACK NEWTON ERG MOTORSPORT MARCOS LM600 10 + 01:22.610 26 2:00.681

Related Images

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Melbourne Grand Prix Circuit Melbourne Grand Prix Circuit