Can anyone stop the red-and-white Soviet Saleen, or is Juliano Flores already preparing his tears for the season finale?
GALVÃO (FDTV Lead): WELCOME, FRIENDS OF FDTV! We are live from the legendary, the high-speed, the completely chaotic Autodromo Nazionale Monza! HAJA CORAÇÃO! Look at what Fernando Horta did today in the USSR Lotus! He didn't just win; he absolutely vaporized the track with a 1:43.718 best lap! Arnaldo, is that even legal under the laws of physics?
ARNALDO (Clueless Co-Commentator): Well, Galvão, the rules say that the car with the round wheels must go forward. But Juliano Flores finished over a minute and twenty seconds behind. That is... a lot of seconds. I think he was looking for mushrooms in the gravel trap.
GALVÃO: A disaster for Scuderia Libra! Horta takes 12 points and expands his championship lead to 128 points! But wait! What is this?! Look at the timing screen! We have a technical mystery!
*A wild ad for YOKI POPCORN interrupts the screen! Munch your way through the chicanes!*
TOEJAM (CamelToe VIP Booth): Yo, Earl, look at that dude Dave in the Losel Racing ride! He only completed 8 laps, but the official clock says his total race time is exactly 21:31.557—down to the millisecond the same as Juliano!
EARL (CamelToe VIP Booth): That is some high-grade, funky cosmic synchronization, homie! Maybe he was drafting so close he entered the same space-time dimension! Big funkin' points for Losel Racing though!
GALVÃO: UNBELIEVABLE! Dave gets his first 4 points while standing still! This is the magic of Formula Duude! The saga continues!
Ps. Lost & Found: Found near the Rettifilo chicane: one golden cassette tape labeled "LOSEL MIX '99" and a slightly singed map of Milan. Claim at the CTR lounge in exchange for two cans of warm Brahma.
