Fernando Horta drove the #01 Williams Grand Prix Ferrari 550 Maranello to a comfortable victory over 13 laps at Circuito de Jerez in 0:22:58.440, leading Roger Wilco and Gecko91 across the line, while team boss Hugh Laurie remained entirely unimpressed by the execution.
Fernando Horta (#01 driver): Guys, why is the steering wheel vibrating like a cheap phone? Is that normal?
Hugh Laurie (#01 Team Principal): People lie, Fernando. Your tyres are lying, your differential is lying, and your lap times are probably fabricated by a rogue toaster. Drive faster.
Fernando Horta (#01 driver): But Lizard and Roger just swapped places ahead of me on lap two, I can't even see the apex through this dust!
Hugh Laurie (#01 Team Principal): Excellent. That means you have fewer distractions. People lie, but gravel traps are remarkably honest about your lack of talent.
Fernando Horta (#01 driver): Okay, I finally passed them by lap seven, the car is actually sticking to the tarmac now! Can I pit for water?
Hugh Laurie (#01 Team Principal): Water is for the weak, and hydration is a myth propagated by dentists. Keep your foot down before I replace you with an MRI machine.
Ps. This radio transmission was proudly brought to you by Duude Energy: when you need to crash into a barrier at 250 km/h with 40% more artificial plum flavour.
