Uwe Alzen took victory at Daytona after 200 blistering laps while Fernando Horta failed to complete a single lap for Williams Grand Prix.
Williams Grand Prix issued a press release this morning that reads as follows:
WE ARE ABSOLUTELY UNSTOPPABLE AND REVOLUTIONIZING THE GT1 CATEGORY AT DAYTONA INTERNATIONAL SPEEDWAY! While Uwe Alzen was busy grinding through 200 grueling laps of high-speed oval banking in his Saleen S7-R, Williams Grand Prix achieved MAXIMUM ENGINE PRESERVATION EFFICIENCY by retiring the #01 Ferrari 550 Maranello before even crossing the start line! ZERO WEAR ON THE TYRES! ZERO FUEL CONSUMPTION! IT IS AN ABSOLUTE STRATEGIC MASTERSTROKE!
We are officially filing a formal protest against the race stewards for failing to award Fernando Horta the inaugural Eco-Speed Trophy! Crew Chief Alan Donatellofson was so overcome with emotional pride over the pit wall radio that he dryly noted: "Brilliant work mate, you didn't even give the spark plugs a chance to warm up. Next race let's just leave the car inside the transport truck and save us all the freight charges." THAT IS THE KIND OF UNBRIDLED PATRIOTIC PASSION WE NEED IN THIS GARAGE!
Furthermore, we are thrilled to announce our new lead sponsor, Muamba Express Banking Services, who fully endorsed our instantaneous pit-lane triumph! While Shakov dragged his Porsche 911 GT2 to 8th and Juliano Flores fought his Viper down in 11th, Horta proved that true motorsport genius is knowing when to quit before Turn 1!
